Autism Dating & Intimacy Help in Singapore

As I was wrapping up my talk at Pathlight School in 2013, a young (non-autistic) lady asked me if I have a girlfriend. This is a question that I was asked often. However, this time the twist was that she has a boyfriend with Aspergers’ Syndrome.

We discussed a few things that would create barriers in the relationship – rigidity about when to finish the date, body rigidity, a dislike for hugs, not being able to sense the “mood” for kissing and a lack of “passion”.

After that discussion, I realized that there is an increasing need in Singapore for helping people with autism create and maintain intimate romantic relationships.

 

For years, I have given talks to promote autism awareness but did not provide any direct help to people with autism. This was not unexpected, since I do not have any qualifications as a therapist, psychiatrist or counselor. My interest has also changed from promoting autism awareness to experiencing life in mainstream society. This time, however, I can contribute my personal experiences by becoming a facilitator to help people with autism develop intimacy.

 

The topics I can cover include:

  1. Basic rules of a relationship
  2. Understanding the implications and costs of having a romantic relationship
  3. Confronting inner fears of intimacy
  4. How to tell if the other party is interested to date you (for singles)
  5. Performing acts of intimacy
  6. Maintaining intimacy and closeness
  7. How to dance wildly :)

Do note that I am not providing professional services, but just informal facilitation as a service to the autism community. While I am not an expert in social skills, I am familiar with the challenges of a romantic relationship and how to overcome them from the perspective of a person with Asperger’s.

 

I expect to see:

  1. Your romantic partner (if you already have a steady relationship)
  2. A volunteer of the opposite sex who is willing for you to practice simple intimate acts like holding hands, full-body hugs and cheek kisses (if you are single)
  3. At least one friend, parent or guardian who can provide additional support and supervision from the non-autistic perspective
  4. A venue with sufficient privacy
  5. Your identity card (for proof that you and your partner/volunteer are above age 18)

 

Payment is on a donation basis. Please email me at if you are interested.

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